“I felt uncomfortable today,” Demi revealed. “Knowing I have bad angles and the photographer can take a bad shot makes me insecure. But I’m a lot better than I used to be. In my first shoot after having treatment, I went into meltdown and ran away from the studio. So I’ve made progress.”
Demi has made huge progress since entering rehab back in November of 2010. Ever since, she has been speaking out and encouraging young girls everywhere to be comfortable in their own skin.
“I’m not saying I’m perfect, or fixed, but I am learning to love and accept myself. My outlook is more positive and I am happy,” Demi said.
Demi’s problems didn’t just come from growing up in the spotlight, the teen star was often bullied in school as a young girl. “They called me a whore and told me I was fat and ugly. I shouldn’t have listened, but I took it to heart and it hurt. I thought maybe I didn’t have friends because I was too fat,” she explained. Demi turned to bulemia and anorexia to deal with the pressures she was feeling. “I’d make myself sick up to six times a day,” she says. “My mum was worried, but because I was going through puberty I was having growth spurts so she assumed that was why I was thinner.”
The singer also turned to drugs to help herself cope. “It’s something I don’t really want to talk about, what I can say is that I was depressed. I would come off stage in front of 18,000 people and suddenly be alone in a hotel room. I’d come crashing down and would try to find a way to recreate that feeling, to stay ‘up’.”
Being in the spotlight apparently made it easier for the young star to get her hands on drugs or alcohol. “Promoters gave me drugs and alcohol in restaurants or clubs. They wanted me to come back so I would be seen there. They were basically kissing my ass. I thought they were my friends. I thought I was having fun. Being a celebrity can be dangerous. Nobody says ‘no’. That’s why so many end up overdosing and dying. It could definitely have happened to me.”
Rumours of Demi’s troubles started a couple years ago when cuts could be seen on her wrists as she appeared at events. “It started with my wrists. People saw that, so I cut in places they couldn’t see, you do it because you feel so bad inside. You don’t know how to take it out other than on yourself.”
Ever since, Demi has been working hard to get back on her feet. She has revealed that she will be continuing on with her music, but isn’t quite ready to return to her acting career. “I need to be secure in my body before I go back in front of the camera. Anyone in recovery from an eating disorder would find that triggering, and I’m not ready. After so long being thin, it was terrifying being heavier. But I am a naturally curvy Hispanic girl. I don’t deprive myself – I had a Kit Kat last night, but I don’t eat s*** every day. I have a meal service that brings my food to my home so I don’t have to think about being healthy.”
Check out the whole interview and photo shoot pictures here!